Hilarious Penalties for 24 Hours Racing

It was my first time to a 24 Hours of LeMons race. As soon as I could see the track, I knew I wanted to do this. How else can you race all day for so little money?  With a set of not-so-serious sounding racing rules we told you about in a another post, there were some very serious safety rules in place at the track. Off-track excursions or spins were subject to penalties and that’s where the 24 Hours of LeMons style fun started. (click the picture to read)

The penalties for a track infraction are wide reaching.  For the worst kinds of repeated offenses, including total disdain for judges, there were simple time penalties, but with a bribe here or there (of course bribes are legal!) you could get off with a written penalties like the ones above.  I won’t guess the political affiliation of “Chief Perpetrator” Jay Lamm.

So what other kinds of penalties did I see? The top photo shows the tires of one team in the stands so they could, “watch and learn how to race.”  Too funny! The car was on jack stands not far away.

For the rest of the penalties, I grabbed some video.  First up is the “Ride the Whip” penalty.

Team Mohawk and their Dodge Neon enjoyed this ride.  The lady drivers got into it! Here’s how it started:

Next is the “Cultural Revolution” penalty imposed by one of the judges and Jalopnik writer/editor Phil Greden. Phil explains how Mao thought his people were “insufficiently revolutionary” and needed a cultural revolution.  “All hail the great helmsman!”

Finally, you’re treated to the Marcel Marceau (yea the French mime) penalty. Here you’ll see Jay explaining why it’s not OK to spin on the track or to drive in a race with one arm out the window. This is the “B Team” BMW we mentioned in the 24 Hours of LeMons driver’s story.

It was fantastic to see all the drivers and judges having a great time. There was no ill tempers and no excessive pride getting in the way. Maybe it’s cause there’s only $1500 at stake or maybe as one racer told me, “This is our time to not think about our real lives.”

Everyone needs that.

What car are you driving in the next 24 Hours of LeMons? I can’t wait to see it!

Only $500 for 24 Hours of Fun Racing

I wrote about the 24 Hours of LeMons (yea, I spelled that right) in another blog about the “Strict Racing Rules”. I expected some easy going people out to have a great time. I found’m!

It took the “Eyesore Racing” shown above 6 months of weekends to put their 94 Mazda Miata together. The car, built for $500 or less by the rules, was made from 2 Miatas practically welded together in the middle. One car had front end damage and no motor and the other had been carefully wrapped around a tree with the front end intact. The engine, including the small rusty-wheeled turbo from a Mexico only Dodge pickup, was resurrected from 4 engines. Where would 24 Hours of LeMons racing be without Craigslist!

The team consists of neighbors and friends making up 4 sets of couples out of Long Beach, CA. In the Phoenix race, their 9th race,  6 of the 8 team members drive including “March Hare” Dave, “Tweedle Dee” Jay, “Tweedle Dum” Dan, “Alice” Sara and “White Rabbit” Sarah and my man, the “Mad Hatter” Kyle who helped with the details for this story. “Queen of Hearts” Caro and “Cheshire Cat” Kurt round out the team.

The combination’s working because team Eyesore won the Phoenix race and became the first every 2 time winner of 24 Hours of LeMons. They won at the Reno-Fernley race, according to this Jalopnik story,  where they were all dressed like Elvis.

Don’t think they were the only team out having fun though… Let me introduce Team “Off Consistently”

I asked Tyler Irwin, what’s with that name?  Duh… nobody beats off consistently!

This 1985 300ZX cruised in from San Diego, CA and is another Craigslist purchase.  Tyler told me it came up on for $300, not running, and they picked it up for $200. They Finished 3rd.

I also found the “B Team”. Swanee and I couldn’t figure out what the black strip running down the roof was until we found their pits. It’s a Mohawk for the B (not A) team BMW. They finished 10th.

Dig team, “Lemon Martini”. Their 1990 Honda CRX. Money’s split between 17 and 20, but they finished 7th in Phoenix.

To show the real spirit of racing, fun that is, I’ll include this last picture.

The “Sac Indicator” tells it all.

Wrapping things up, here’s a video that shows most of the cars competing. Don’t hate the big 4 door Olds 98 you see cruise by. They took 5th!

MyRideisMe.com will be trying it’s hardest to enter this race next year.  Who’s with me?!

Fresh LeMons with ahhh… Strict Rules – For FUN!

Call them “lemons” or piles of crap or simply junk. Still, can you argue these guys are having fun racing them!?

I first heard about the Concours d’LeMons and took note because it was part of the super prestigious and maybe super “snobby” Monterey Concours Week including the world famous Concours d’Elegance. Dating back to 1950, we can’t hate on the big-daddy of Concours Week in Pebble Beach because they now include class “U” Hot Rods: Lakesters and Bonneville Racers. Gotta hit that show one of these days!

The 24 Hours of LeMons, an obvious play on the 24 Hours of LeMans, the worlds oldest endurance sports car race, the “Lemons” used in this race are cars worth not more than $500.  More than anything I’m wondering, what kind of cars get entered and when can I see this first hand?  Turns out, I’ll show you the cars here and see’m first hand in Phoenix at the kickoff event for the LeMons series at Firebird Raceway.

Dubbed the Auction-Weekend Gavel-Tap GP in honor of the slew of high dollar auction that are part of Arizona’s Auction Week, the race is held on the 1.1 mile west course at Firebird. The gates open early Friday, January 22nd for tech inspection, then race session 1 starts Saturday at 10AM continuing with session II at 9AM on Sunday.

If you’re thinking, “So what, junk cars racing, I see that on my drive to Maricopa every day.” then you should have a look at some of the rules and how they’re written. If the racing environment is even near as fun as the rules, this is a must see.

First off, it costs $500 to enter and $100 per racer.  Not too bad if you’re in the race for a 3 days for a little over a grand. But what’s that get you?  The usual things, plus, “sweatshop-made commemorative crap, and anything else we come up with by then.” That sounds worth it…

Continuing down the rules, I was curious how they figure out the $500. What’s that include and not include? In straight forward Enlgish rule 4.1.1 explains:

Lame-Ass Rationalizations: Cars that “should be” worth $500 don’t count; cars that “were worth $500″ before you spent another $2000 to fix them don’t count; cars you’ve owned for 20 years and spent more than $500 on during that time don’t count; “it would have been worth $500 if it didn’t already have a cage” doesn’t count. Five hundred dollars means five hundred frickin’ dollars.

To keep things safe, quite a few safety items are exempt from the $500. That includes Wheels, tires, wheel bearings, and brake components, so that helps, but from the pictures, it doesn’t look like folks are spending alot on high performance wheels.

Just in case any questions come up or a team is just over the limit, the rules include a “BS Factor”.  At the end of the day, teams are trying to win by finishing the most laps, same as most endurance races. So the BS Factor penalizes 1 lap for every $10 over the $500 race car limit. The BS Factor panel of judges run a tight ship and as for appeals, “Get real. There’s no appealing this decision. You’re boned.”  You gotta go read the rules where you’ll also these fun rules:

• 2.4: Whiner Eligibility.
  • “Whiners are not eligible to compete. If you believe that you might be a whiner, please check with a domestic partner, guardian, or health-care professional before getting the rest of your team kicked the hell out of the race.”
• 6.1: Individual Lousy-Driving Rule
• 6.2: Team Lousy-Driving Rule
• 6.3: Why Am I Upside-Down?
• 6.4: Touching a Temporary Barrier
  • “An automatic Lousy Driving Offense With Extreme Prejudice. (You don’t even want to know what that means.)”

See!!??

The final couple rules keeping things honest is the “Claiming Rule” (self explanatory) and rule 1.6: Your Car May Be Destroyed at Any Time.  Through a blind ballot of all teams, one car is selected to be immediately and completely destroyed, right there at the track!

Who knows why you’ll get picked but as the rules clearly state: “It could be your car. It probably WILL BE your car. You’ll have 30 minutes to yank out any safety items you want to rescue, and then it’s toast. Them’s the breaks. Don’t bring it if you ain’t OK with losing it.”

For the $20/day or $30/weekend general-access paddock passes, this sounds like fun on wheels like we haven’t seen since your church’s demolition derby.  Can you make it? See ya there!

Funny Car Chief Austin Coil on Drag Racing Today

If you’re a fan of NHRA drag racing, then there’s a great chance you’re a fan of John Force Racing and his team. As a Ford fan, (don’t forget, Pop’s was a Ford Mechanic for 25 years) I’ve been following Force for as long as I can remember so when I got the chance to interview co-crew chief Austin Coil, I jumped at it.

Meeting with Austin Coil in the small town the John Force Racing trucks make was awesome. Cruising past the beast Force pilots down the strip as his crew finished prepping for Saturday at the Firebird Race, then stepping into the trailer you often see on TV was unreal. I carefully tried to keep my grin from extending past my ears as I sat down with Coil.

Without his trademark toothpick, Coil smiled alot and seemed to be winding down from Friday’s session that saw all of John Force Racing cars in the top half of the field. Coil’s easy going manner and obvious passion for racing and technology made this interview a breeze. I just had to keep up…

WHAT’S CHANGED THE MOST ABOUT FUNNY CARS SINCE YOU’VE BEEN RUNNING THEM?
Everything! In the last few years, there’s been an extraordinary push for safety and these cars are tremendously safer then just a few years ago… and it’s a damn good thing cause we’ve lost a few of our brothers and it was necessary. John Force Racing has spearheaded a lot of this and Ford was instrumental in making those changes.

(When thinking about safety equipment…)
These race cars are really archaic compared to what’s on the road now. If you drive your Ford Flex in the rain and snow and ice there’s all kinds of electronic wizardry to protect you, let alone what’s being developed. Up until this campaign started (2009′s Full Throttle Season) we’re not allowed to run anything to protect you.

Currently, we have an electronic shut off system that can sense if we blow the blower off or it can sense a burning pistons or if the fire bottles have been activated and it automatically turns off the fuel and pull the chutes in case the driver isn’t able.

One of the questions I wanted to ask Austin was about a safety system that could remotely turn off the fuel and pull the chutes. He said that a team was planning a test of a system exactly like that at the Firebird Race. Testing during race day might a bad idea, but with today’s economy and the existing ban on testing during the season, there’s no other choice.

Things have to be tested during the race, but for the majority of people who were gonna race, they’d use their test days on something that’s going to help them win.

WHAT ABOUT NEW TECHNOLOGIES LIKE DIRECT INJECTION? (Injecting fuel directly into the cylinder instead of before the intake valve.)

No, it’s not allowed…
Everything new is prohibited unless it becomes approved. We’ve been racing under a moratorium for about 4 or 5 years now to prevent any technological break-thrus to help control cost. And the Association (NHRA) is vehemently against any type of closed-loop controls. It would be pretty simple to have clutch and/or engine controls that would sense tire spin and keep cars from smoking the tires or prevent tire shake, I mean, your Ford Flex has got it, so why can’t our race cars? Well, cause it’s not legal. It does add some drama and excitement to the sport, but by the same token, it keeps there from being as many side by side races as there could be. I don’t claim to know what makes the best show and the best popularity and the most likelihood that our vocation will be as successful as it could be throughout the years and the Association believes it’s better that even the best cars don’t go down the track all the time to give the underdog a better chance of winning once in a great while. Maybe they’re right, I don’t know.

THAT WOULD SEEM TO HURT THE BEST FUNDED TEAMS LIKE YOURS.

You know, our team is certainly very well funded, but everyone is feeling the crunch of the economy so you gotta be careful you don’t waste any money and it probably wasn’t like that a few years ago. You know, a number of years ago Force used to have meetings will the crew chiefs to figure out how we could spend the money we have effectively to increase our chances of winning. Now, we have meetings about how we’re going to survive this economic crunch because all of the income we had in the past years is not there now. We’re still in pretty good shape and all our major sponsors are all strong and with us and things look pretty good, but there’s lots of little affiliates that added the gravy to the team’s finances that have fallen by the way side.

AFTER DRAG RACING FOR 25 YEARS, YOU STILL LOVE IT?

Yea! Yunno, Its’ what I do. I’m 63 years old now, I’m not likely to pick a new career! I’ve been running a race car, soley for a living since 1968. I ran my own team for 18-19 years before I tied up with John, so that’s what I do. I don’t know nothing else. I make a really good living and I’m glad it all worked out!

With the Direct Injection or other engine TQ technology, the injectors wouldn’t stand up to the 15k lbs of cylinder pressure (we measured it!) and the volume of fuel needed would be prohibited. Many cars run 100 gal/min fuel pumps. Just idling on the starting line, waiting to go, the typical fuel car uses 5.25 gal/min… better not let it idle too long or you’ll be out of gas!

A FEW YEARS AGO, JOHN FORCE RACING DOMINATED. WITH ALL DUE RESPECT, HAVE YOU GUYS SLIPPED A LITTLE OR HAS EVERYONE ELSE CAUGHT UP?

You know, the biggest method that caused us to win over all the years… if you look back in time we’d win 10-12-13 races per year just with John’s car alone, not to mention the team cars, but the way we did that is we’d create something that everyone else didn’t have that was an advantage to get down the track more consistently… or just plain be faster! And every year, NHRA has made rules against something… the Association really dislikes any one guy winning all the time. Essentially, they’re out to get’cha! And I don’t blame them. The idea is to levels the playing field. When you go to the races knowing Force is gonna win, you’re not as likely to draw as many spectators as you might if the fans are wondering if Force is gonna beat Capps. At any rate, they continue to make rules and now there’re so damned many rules, your hands are tied in almost every aspect.

And then, in the last couple years, we’ve spent the majority of our time focusing on keeping our drivers alive and healthy and even the rest of the sport whether they like it or not. Everything you do to a race car to make it safer makes it slower. If you’re the one initiating all of that, for a period of time you’re running all that safety equipment before it’s required and you’re determined to run it cause you don’t want to see another Eric Medlen or John Force incident, and so you do those things. And many of the racers out there are not as concerned, they just believe in destiny where I tend to believe you can control your own destiny. The Association has worked well with us and many of the safety things that have come along are being required, more every year, and it’s getting closer to being a level playing field.

But for instance, right now, our cars are 50 lbs heavier then legal weight. We have every titanium, magnesium, carbon fiber, light-weight component that money can buy! But because our cars have a number of safety features that everyone else is not yet required to have, they’re heavier. That’s a little disadvantage. That’s certainly not everything, the biggest thing is, as I said, innovation has been stymied by the rules so the only way you can be faster than everyone else is to be better at every-single-facet of the hundreds of points of running the car and that’s very hard. The way we played it in the past decade is we’d create something that everyone else didn’t have that actually mattered and put it to use and waltz through the field. All those days are gone now cause they actually have rules on everything where they didn’t 10 years ago. You used to have the freedom to create a lot new things.

WHAT HAVE THEY RECENTLY TAKEN AWAY?

It’s not that they’ve taken anything away, they just prevent new technology. Eventually, everything leaks out to where you will not have anything in drag racing that everyone doesn’t know about in a couple years. For example, we did development on supercharges a number of years ago where we improved them 10% over the winter. It’s all legal, to go further is easy but not legal! (he said with a smile) The pro-mod guys run blowers similar to ours but they were allowed to move ahead where we were forced to stop. For a year, no one knew what we had, but now everybody has it, if they want it, its out there you can buy it, that was the most recent development.

Going back 15 years ago, no one had any adjustable timing controls on their motors… you just set the timing when you started the motor and that’s how it’d run down the race track. Well, we developed a system with air cylinders that you could move the timing around. To have it and to learn how to use it was a real big thing. Within a couple years everyone had it and then it became electronic and got better and now the box that controls the timing is state of the art where you draw maps and put it in there and not only can you have it, everyone has to have it, it’s part of the required ignition system. Years ago when we all had like 5 amp magnetos. Well if you can figure out how to build a 10amp magneto, you’d have an advantage. Well, not any more, you must run a non-modified MSD ignition system of this part number period, if you’re not you’re cheating. They’re very good and in a way it’s kind of a nice thing, but MSD says, ‘boy, we could make one twice that powerful!’ NHRA says, ‘No you can’t we don’t want anything better.’

So it goes on and on and on to where the potential development is halted by the Association as it is in NASCAR. They have the brakes on virtually everything. Just ask any of’m… those Cars of Tomorrow ain’t any-wheres near as quick around the race track as they used to be, but they all gotta run’m, and you know what? When they crash, they don’t die. So it’s a good thing and we’re undergoing all that. But it’s not as conducive to having a situation where you can dominate the way it was 10 years ago.

DO YOU SEE DRAG RACING GOING TO A ‘CARS OF TOMORROW’ LIKE NASCAR?
I do see that. We’re undergoing constant development on building better, safer chassis with driver’s tubs and compartments. The cars we have here have tubs in them but they’re not a total driver’s capsule. The next iteration will probably be a total driver’s capsule to where even if the chassis were to break apart the driver would still be protected.
KIND OF LIKE A NITRO BOAT?
Something like that… but all that adds weight, weight adds the problem that you have to stop it at the other end, so there’s lots of problems with all that development. The cars we have right now, we believe, are 4-7 times safer then the car that John crashed at Dallas two years ago. We’re hoping that’s safe enough, but you never know. We’re doing all we can.

Special thanks to Elon Werner – JFR Public Relations – for the interview. Best of luck to all the John Force Racing Team for 2009!

Follow John Force Racing at www.twitter.com/jfr_racing

John’s Drag Blog – Old Fuelers Never Die!

Story Submitted by John C. Hill or MoparMagic

Old Fuelers Never Die!! (They just become “killer” bracket cars)

Many of you that were spectators at drag races during the late 60′s, the 70′s and early 80′s probably remember a lot of the fantastic Top Fuel and Funny Cars that used to compete. Some of these cars may have been favorites of yours, but have you ever wondered what became of these ultimate drag race machines? It’s not like you could take the pink slip and sell it to your neighbor after the racing season was over. These were special built cars with only one purpose in mind: go fast and do it quickly!

A lot of these cars ended up out behind the garage as scrap, or perhaps pushed over in the corner of the garage and covered with a tarp, never to be raced again. Some of them ended up in museums such as Don Garlit’s Drag Race Museum in Ocala, Florida. If you have ever been to his museum you would be amazed at the number and quality of Top Fuelers and Funny Cars on display there. This includes every one of Don’s Top Fuel cars from his career, including the rebuilt car that sawed part of his foot off in a clutch explosion in 1969. If you are a true drag race fan, a visit to his museum is an absolute must see.

There are a few cars that have lived to race again! Because of the recent popularity of Nostalgia Racing, many associations have been started with the purpose of racing the old cars once again. NHRA holds several Nostalgia Racing meets throughout the year which are becoming more and more popular with the fans. The “Kackle Fest” is most impressive with all the front engine dragsters firing up at once to make some incredible noise! The “Nitro Funny Car Association” is running strong with some of the most famous cars of the era including the “Blue Max”, “Plueger and Gyger”, “Pisano and Matsubara” and many others. I recently saw these guys run at Firebird Raceway this fall, and they hold nothing back. It’s just like the good old days when cubic dollars wasn’t necessary to build and race a competitive car.

Then there are guys like me, who find and purchase old cars to turn them into bracket racers. I have been racing a 440 powered 1970 Cuda at Firebird Raceway since 1994. But like every other drag racer, I wanted to go quicker and faster, without spending huge amounts of money. To me, the plan was simple, find an old rear engine dragster and update it to a killer bracket car. I was unaware of just how lucky I would be when I answered an advertisement for a rear engine “roller” for sale in my area. The car was a 225 inch rear engine dragster that was run briefly in the 90s as a NHRA Super Comp class car. The owner was selling it as is, frame, wheels and tires, Ford 9 inch rear end, and body panels with fuel tank. That’s it. For $5,500, it was mine, and it was up to me to build all the rest. As I started to tow it home, the owner gave me a copy of the history of the car. I was very surprised as I read the contents…

The dragster was originally built by Eddie Delarno of Eddies Engineering of Tucson in the mid 70′s. It was built for Red Greth and Lyle Fisher of Speed Sport Automotive fame. It was originally built for a Hemi engine and was to see Top Fuel action. They never fielded the car and it sat in their garage for several years. It was brought back to Eddie for an updating after it was sold in the early 80′s. In the early 90′s the car was updated by Tom Yancer with a new roll cage and back half. The wheelbase was also shortened from 250 inches to 225 inches and a modern tripod front suspension was installed. The entire car was updated to “advanced ET” status and was run as a Super Comp car with Bruce Kenyon at the controls. The Mark Williams prepped Ford 9 inch rear end sported 4.56 gears and is a Top Fuel setup with 35 spline axles. A Strange Engineering pinion support and aluminum third member completed the rear end.

A car like this is built to run in the 6′s at over 200mph. Since I didn’t have a lot of money, I purchased a 360 cubic inch magnum, 380 horsepower “crate motor” directly from Mopar Performance for $3,500. The space for the transmission was tiny, so I went with a “shorty” 727 Torqueflite out of a motorhome, prepped by Hughes Performance for another $550. I did all the rest of the work myself including plumbing all the lines, the electrical system, the cooling system, the brakes, the safety requirements, and even a few dollars for “rattle can” black, yellow and fluorescent orange paint! Hey, if it doesn’t make it go faster, I don’t spend a lot of money on it! Grand total for an awesome bracket car: less than $10,000!! Since I do not run any “electronics” of any sort, I could run in the “Pro” class at Firebird Raceway.

As it turns out the choice of the motor for this 1,650 pound car was perfect. The car runs consistently at 10.00 seconds at 134 mph. NHRA rules state that cars that run quicker than 9.99 seconds or faster than 135 mph must comply with much stricter (and expensive) safety rules. I didn’t have to have all this extra safety equipment, and that saved me huge amounts of extra money. I’d like to say it was planned, but how lucky was that? And running 10 flat at 134 mph is still a maximum rush as you can imagine! And, it also makes me one of the quickest cars in the “Pro” class which means my opponents almost always have to leave first, and potentially red light!

As I’m writing this I have plans to bring the car home so that I can start prepping it for the 2009 “Team Firebird” bracket racing season. Our first race should be in February, and we race at least once a month all year after that. Stayed tuned to my blogs as I fill you in on all of our results, race by race this year. I’ll tell you who we run, what our dial in and tune up strategy is, how we won or lost races, and all the maintenance and costs we encounter to run the whole season. Essentially, you will become a member of our crew you’ll be with us race by race as we plan to win the “Pro” class in NHRA “Team Firebird” bracket race action this year. Shoot, we’ll even run an Episode of “Pinks All Out” if they come to a track in the southwest this year! As a fringe benefit, the NHRA Division 7 Championship Finals will be held at Firebird Raceway this year. We plan on finishing in the top 10 (if not winning our class) in Pro this year, which will qualify us for that race against the West Coast’s best bracket racers for Divison 7 honors. So stay tuned, the thrill is about to begin!!

John

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